Poem Labels Disabled and Policing Bill 2021 UK

 

I wrote this poem about the Policing Bill in the UK in 2021. It started off as a dig about the way people shamefully disable themselves and one another with labels of serious mental health issues. 

Most mental health illnesses are generally stereotyped in some way, these stereotypes are often incorrect. 

I have been labelled with many serious mental health conditions over the span of 30 years or more, and I can personally conclude that many of these labels have led me to feel weak often, and I believe at times have caused me to feel more psychological pain and damage. 

Labels often stigmatise us, and so when I encounter many many other people who unnecessarily label themselves with series mental health conditions, when in fact they have never received a diagnosis from a qualified medical professional, well it makes me wonder why? 

The diagnosis of some psychological disorders can take years, and usually involve a number of professional medical health care workers who are specialists like psychiatrists and psychotherapists, and clinical Psychologists etc,.

Over my life time this is kind of how my story through the mental health care system went. In 2023 I am still under the care of the Community Mental Healthcare Team, Psychiatrist and Psychotherapist and having weekly therapy sessions. 

My story started over 30 years ago...

• Initial GP referral to Well-Being
• Going through all the Well-Being services
• Then a referral to the Community Mental Healthcare Team (CMHT) involves 
• Meeting support workers 
• Having regular support meetings 
• Seeing psychiatric nurses answering endless questions and filling in what seems like endless forms, going over the history of your life time and time again, after all, they cannot help you until the understand what the issues and problems are
• Therapies for Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT) 
• Therapies for Anxiety 
• Going to external organisations and help groups for counseling and group therapy for other concerns such as
• Domestic Abuse 
• Domestic Violence 
• Child abuse 
• Rape
• Alcoholic Anonymous to overcome alcoholism
• Drug Rehabilitation to over drug addiction
• Freedom Programme group
• Regular one to one sessions with a qualified psychotherapist 
• Mind* 
• Pottergare Center*
• If patient has a drink and or drugs problem then if they get a diagnosis it will tend to be a dual diagnosis, since it's very difficult for psychiatrists to fully diagnose other psychological disorders in the presence of substance abuse
• Once patient has abstained for a lengthy time then they may get a different diagnosis
• A number of psychological assessments are often carried out by highly qualified clinical psychologist(s) and psychiatrist(s) at various times throughout my journey
• Learning to listen to the advice given is vital 
• Actively acting on advice given to help yourself is very important
• Making positive life choices and changes can only really occur at the right time 
• Never miss an appointment and try to never cancel an appointment because if you do, it's likely you will find yourself sliding back down that ladder like you are playing and losing a game of Snakes and Ladders, you might slide right back down to square one, which tends to be a re referral back to CMHT 
• Sadly over the years my journey has been up and down

It is a lengthy heartfelt and relentless  process and far from easy, just as you get to know a psychiatric nurse they leave and that connection is broken, just as you are getting somewhere with a very specialised psychotherapist you run out of funding and cannot afford the private one to one sessions; then just as you are requested by the Consultants of the Pottergate Center to go for further specialised assessments your known GP retires and  the new assigned GP who has never met you, ignores the letters and referral from the Pottergate Specialist Consultants.

Whilst going through this very bumpy journey I decided the best thing I could do is to study psychology and learn what I can about myself by myself. 

A lack of mental healthcare resources and services, means when finally being referred for some specialised therapy called Cognitive Analytical Therapy (CAT) I find I've been waiting so far almost 2 years with no end in sight, and that's if it does not get forgotten altogether. For about the fourth time in my lifetime my very good psychiatric nurse left the CMHT in June 2021. And when my Psychiatrist carried out my last telephone interview in December 2021 he is referring me for a new assessment by another specialist. 

A large array of medical psychological healthcare specialists cannot seem to agree upon a conclusive Psychological diagnosis of me, after some 30 years? 

Will I ever truly understand myself? 

Anyway after I made the original start to my poem about "Labels Disable" I continued the poem and took it off into a different direction. This was to try and encourage other people to sign the Policing Bill petition in the UK in 2021. The petition is important so that UK citizen's can maintain the civil liberties of being able to peacefully protest and peacefully march. 

I believe the Government are wrong in trying to steal this right away from us, our so called freedom of speech is somewhat limited right now, it's distasteful how they have tried to creep this policing bill through unnoticed, it's just awful imho.

So the poem ended up like this:-

Labels Disabled and the Policing Bill UK 

Tied round my neck with cables strangling disarming labels,

tied round my wrists with rope sucking from my life all hope,

so tight they are wrapped leather straps, 

they never release and let go, for who would I be if set free 

of these binds tangled up lines, 

they cut at my limbs scratch at my skin

who would I have been without these?

Bondage chained, handcuffed restrained

keeping me low, keeping me still 

stealing my power, stealing my will,

who will I be if set free?

I've been tricked in-to believing this thread bearing weaving

it's kind for my mind, for others to find

it's something that I should wear everyday 

some say it's fair that way,

that it's best others know whenever I go

my twisted labels crisply show marked disabled!

May as well say twatty un-abled, 

twatty un-skilled, mentally retarded mentally illed, 

scarred with hard realisation, 

who carried out these calculations?

Mark em with A, stamped em with B, 

we will add any letter as we do agree, 

lock em up, loose the key healthy or not, let em rot, 

we don't care, we've no time, if it's a crime

stand tall and protest, wear a bright yellow vest

do your best to be peaceful graceful and quiet, 

never a need for violence or riot, 

now look at the date is it too late

to stand tall, make your point and share

make unbeknown people newly aware

so quick make a decision go sign that petition now some how,

before we lose some unfair undeclared basic human rights, 

because we don't have many left in our sights,

we are labelled crippled by them, made disabled, 

every day, every night, every place every step I take, every trace

made to feel like a total disgrace.

 

Still plenty of space to go, so go sign your name 

it will be a crying shame if you don't!

By (c)12th May 2021 Toni Cairns.