Getting the Giggles

Getting The Giggles

That moment that day

felt like my heart 

would almost give way, 

the fit of giggles, 

ripped at my stomach

the fit of giggles, 

just wouldn't let up, 

hard to recall the words 

that started the race,

that set off my laughter 

into a massive fast pace.

Know, it was on 

the subject matter

of stuttering speech, 

and of a st-st-st-stammer.

And even though 

guilt riddles me over

with neglect of respect 

for my own brother.

For as we grew up, 

his nerves rattled his speech, 

often led to the reddening 

of his little peach cheeks, 

but, still as my father 

would crack rather harsh jokes, 

poking unfairly towards 

his weak words as he spoke,

and even when I could tell

it was breaking his spirit, 

I couldn't prevent 

my giggles from spilling.

The fit of giggles, 

ripped at my stomach

the fit of giggles, 

just wouldn't let up. 

So, when I recall the day 

my heart almost gave way,

from giggling so silly and gay.

I'm riddled with guilt

from the feelings I felt,

I can't help but wonder

"Was I taught well?"

Is it ok to laugh at another

especially when 

it's your own loving brother.

But, I will say now

that when memories from past

arise out of surprise,

there is just no guise I have

and no way to hide 

from the snide little giggles

I laughed and a child.

By

Toni Cairns

(c)28th February 2021.